Poop on a stick
Posted by SpIkE on 10/23/06.

Since Motorola has released the RAZR, PEBL, and the KRZR I just felt that they might have stopped short. I mean, having LEET hackers come up with the names for your products was pretty cool, but I have another ground breaking idea for Motorola.


Developed for women and girlie-men who live in the city by themselves, the tazr is the solution for protecting yourself in dangerous situations. But having TWO devices to stop an assailant and then call the police takes up too much room in your purse or messanger bag. It's also just too clumsy. Imagine being able to eliminate the tedious task of serching for what device you need to zap a rapist in the balls. That's why we fused two essential devices into one. That's right, the razr has been fused with a taser to become...the tazr.

Here is a scenario:

Without tazr -

- Rapist: I'm gonna rape you.
- Woman: Don't do it!
- Woman puts down phone and digs through purse to find taser.
- Woman gets raped.
- Rapist steals purse and phone.

With tazr -

- Rapist: I'm gonna rape you.
- Gay guy: YAY! Don't do it!
- Gay guy switches on taser built into his cellphone and zaps assailant.
- Gay guy calls police then gets one of their numbers.

See? the tazr will revolutionize the way people talk AND protect themselves from potentially deadly assault.

God, I am awesome!

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FreakBurrito @ 10/23/06

SpIkE @ 10/23/06
"I thought so..."

SpIkE @ 10/23/06
""Developed for women and girlie-men who live in the city by themselves" i didn't realize how sexist that sounded...i just figured that would be the market angle."

LittleMega @ 10/25/06
"you're amazing"

Batman @ 10/28/06
"Wait, is this real? If so, I want one. "

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