Will write columns for nudie pics
Do I have a damn thing to write about? NO! But that has never stopped me before, and as I make my return to my old column here on FV, I expect you to expect me to expect from myself something that we all expected. Total shit.
Hi, I'm Andy. I have returned.
We're all familiar with the game QWOP about a retarded ragdoll with messed up legs trying to be the big hero of the Olympics. The game is about as pointless as ears on an asshole (they are always listening), and I'm a bigger asshole for even playing it! Long story short, I actually got to the 100 meter mark doing something that looked more like a crab walk than actual running. Here's your proof.
Looks like I didn't save the screen shot. I'm sure as hell NOT doing it again. So just believe me, k? So what inspired all this QWOP talk? This video. Enjoy. (NSFW)
I was in TEARS laughing at this. Hope you were too. That is all for now. Maybe next time I'll have a more enthralling topic. But you're not writing this, I am. Sometimes I give you gold, sometimes I give you QWOP.
Posted on March 28th, 2011 | Comments 
Best of 2007
I was just asked what I thought the best movie and album of 2007 were. Well, here's my answer.
Best Movie of 2007 - Grindhouse Presents - Planet Terror
This one is a no brainer. Does it get any better than this? - Zombies, senseless violence, and a hot go-go dancer with a gun for a leg! There were times watching this movie that I just started laughing out loud because it's just so damn messed up. It's as if Robert Rodriguez had a huge checklist of awesomely sick or violent things he wanted to do and just randomly threw them into the movie where ever he see fit - and it worked beautifully. The acting is fantastically stylized to the point where it's almost corny, but honestly, that's the charm of this kind of movie. Rose McGowan is stellar and somehow remained super sexy even while limping around on a peg leg. This is my absolute top pick for 2007. Death Proof was also an honorable mention under the Grindhouse name, but honestly, the cast was MUCH weaker and the hour worth of chick banter made me want to shoot myself...better yet, have Rose McGowan shoot me with her gun-leg.
Best Album of 2007 - The Black and White Album - The Hives
This was a tough pick because there were some really amazing albums that were released this year. Between Radiohead, The Shins, and Nine Inch Nails the competition was tough as hell. For some reason this album never got as much of the mainstream spotlight as the competition, probably because of how brash it is. The Swedes of The Hives have once again put together a power packed TRUE rock and roll album for the ages, and although it may not be an album that goes down in history, it's because the people writing the books are pussies with sensitive hearing. This album is so charged up you can't help but start jamming out to it. Do yourself a favor and pick up this album. I promise you won't regret it.
Posted on January 24th, 2008 | Comments 
People are Strange
I just stumbled this video and enjoyed it immensely. Perhaps you will as well?
Posted on January 16th, 2008 | Comments