A brief (and deliciously vague) history lesson:
Performed music used to be just instrumental, and composers would labor for years over a piece, trying to use such a simple tool to convey emotions or stories. Most lyrical music was only sung in taverns by tone-deaf peasants whose courage had been chemically boosted, and as such the lyrics mostly praised alcohol and women, and made fun of politicians.

Then composers and performers began setting poems to music for performance, using both words and tones to get the message across. And the peasants in the tavern kept singing.

Eventually performed music was simplified to the point where one person could compose, play AND sing, thus being able to use the subtle nuances of instruments and voice to display the fine details of emotion; the performer would be able to write songs about their emotions and experiences, and then be able to perform them directly from the heart. And the peasants in the tavern kept on singing.

Fast forward to present day. Somewhere along the line, our composers, lyricists, instrumentalists and vocalists have been replaced by record companies and pretty faces. Britney Spears, Backstreet Boys, N+SYNC, Avril Levergne (if that's how you spell her name...). The list goes on and on-preening, airbrushed, augmented and/or slimmed, these modern "musicians" believe that they are the end result of the evolution of music because, just as humans have distanced themselves from the apes as much as possible, these fame whores have distanced themselves from the art of music. They take the generic love story of highschool romance, have someone else write horrifically unimaginative and repetitive lyrics and music to it, record it once and then lipsinc along with it in front of crowds of screaming pre-adolescents while moving about in random, jerky patterns.

Since we aren't allowed to call it what it really is, a showcase for the cosmetics and photo-finishing industries, we call it "bubblegum pop". As offended as I am by most unnecessary euphamisms, this one seems oddly appropriate. Bubblegum is a worthless, empty food item with no nutrition and very little flavor. Thouroughly chemicalized, standardized and homogenized, bubblegum is as close to refreshment or nourishment as bubblegum pop is to Bach. It's time we recognized it for what it really is-a plague. Pop is a cancer, eating up the few remaining true artists with sky-high album sales and spreading faster than it is dying.

And now, joy of joys, your friends at Mephistophles Programming have created an excellent new concept: a "reality" program with the sole goal of CREATING NEW POP STARS. It's like some sort of evil spawning pool, but televised. In fact, if you've ever seen the Fellowship of the Rings motion picture, specifically the Orukai factory under Isingaard, you have a pretty good picture of what I mean. And the people involved with this show, because stupid Americans eat that sort of thing with a spoon, will make money out the nose. Please, fredrickville readers, as the saving remnant of society, I ask that you refrain from watching "American Idol(atry)" or supporting pop musicians. If we don't encourage them with our dollars, maybe they will go away and leave us alone.

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