Last night, my family was watching television, while I was reading in the same room. At the end of the show, my family left, leaving the infernal contraption running. I chose to ignore it, and kept on reading.



Then the next show came on: Extreme Makeovers. Oh Boy! This is why I don’t watch television that often. “Three lucky people” the announcer bragged “are about to go under the knife to achieve the perfect look. Many people applied, and many deserved the honor. But in the end, we could only choose three.” So, I shook my head violently and went back to my book, hoping that someone would come and turn off this obscenity and spare me the trouble of getting up (we don’t have a remote-we only get two stations, so what’s the point?). But it was too late; my concentration had been broken. As I rose to close the portal through which so much idiocy was pouring into our humble abode, they were introducing the “lucky” recipients of free plastic surgery and botox injections. They drove up to one woman’s house, knocked on the door, and told her that she had been selected to receive an “extreme makeover”. She burst into tears of joy, and her husband who was standing there gave her a big hug. It was really touching. Except that she was so overjoyed because she would be receiving dangerous, unnecessary surgery so that she could conform more closely to an ideal of beauty which had been shoved down her throat from childhood. Does this make anyone else sick?



My beef with this show is twofold: I object very strongly to the idea of plastic surgery and botox injections, and televising it just makes it more disgusting.



Plastic surgery-altering your very being, the miraculous chunk of flesh allotted to you for use during your time on Earth, to make it look like a different, supposedly more attractive, chunk of flesh. From nose jobs to liposuction to collagen injections to stomach stapling to semi-permanent makeup, people every day are willingly undergoing surgery with a high chance of infection to make themselves look like…well…like celebrities and models. Like people we are told are attractive, people we are told to idolize.



Even better is the more recent discovery of the miraculous botulism toxin. That’s right, toxin. As in poison. As in stuff that kills you and your cells. This particular toxin comes from a dangerous bacteria. Yippee. And people pay big bucks to have it put into their FACES! The way botox works is that it paralyzes your face by temporarily (hopefully) separating skin from facial muscles. What a high price to pay for beauty! You know, paralysis of the face can be obtained more cheaply and easily through stroke.



And, to top it all off, they’re televising this stuff. People are watching it. Have we really sunk so low that we are willing to spend our time staring at a glowing electronic screen to see people abuse themselves in the name of beauty? Although I suppose I shouldn’t even have to ask that. Underwire bras, makeup, waxes, exercise equipment, hair extensions, gels, shampoos, conditioners and mousses are sold by the thousands every day. And in the evenings, people tune into beauty pageants, celebrity gossip shows, or the shop-from-home, buy-some-gaudy-costume-jewelry channel. The swimsuit issue is the highest-selling issue of Sports Illustrated, even though it has nothing to do with sports. God Bless America.

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